The BN Village - View Single Post

*CUTIE* · (#55 (**permalink**))

I wasn't even going to comment on this thread as it just seemed to be slightly repetitive and destructive to me. As someone pointed out this is a debating forum and the objective is to debate, but when that debate begins to resemble an attempt by certain individuals to simply cause conflict (I'm not referring to the person who started the thread or Camille), then thats where it starts to get boring and loses purpose.

Now we all had our amusement ostracising and ridiculing 'unattractive white gal' in the 'black men white woman' forum (including me), but that was a slightly less constructively worded and perceived post as opposed to this one, I dont think Soul sista's intention was to create another self-destructive, needless thread, but to gain valuable feedback and insight into the whys? whens? hows? ifs? and wheres? of the subject matter.

I am a black woman, I love and interact (sexually and romantically) exclusively with black men, I do not see that as unusual, wrong or untoward, as to be attracted to one's ownrace to me, is a natural notion. When I see white women and black men (especially unattractive wm) yeah I do feel negativity towards them I'm not gonna lie (its not to the extent where it would stop me sleeping at night, or that Id want to physically attack or dish out dirty looks etc, but I do feel it). The reasoning behind this negativity may be that Im asking myself 'couldn't this guy find a decent, caring, etc.... black woman to love and cherish? Whats so unappealing about bw that causes a man to disregard them as partners and prefer a wm? Also knowing the scorn and ultimate dislike that wm hold in regards to black women, I feel almost like me and my sisters have beenbetrayed (not gonna lie), and bm are giving them (wm) the means to metaphorically stick 2 fingers up at us. With black women I think there is also a slight feeling of rejection, just a few overall theories, nothing concrete, I may be right I may be wrong but its my perception of the situation.

@ Spice - ur condoning mixed relationships because you are participating in one but that doesn't mean you have to hark on about it at every instance you get. You have chosen to date outside ur race, whether wrong or right thats ur perogative, other bw (including myself) choose to date solely black men that is also a choice. This isa choice I can justify by retaining the knowledge that I love and admire my father, grandfather (not incestuously b4 u mention it)etc and feel only another black man is worthy ofthe receipt of that level of emotion from me......... I love my people as a whole and need to interact on a social, mental, spiritual, and sexual level with someone who I feel has similar descent and someone I can relate to. I do not think I could relate to a white man, I dont think we'd have all that in common, I do not believe I could or would open up to him and I do not think deep down I would trust him.

BUT THOSE ARE SIMPLY MY PERSONAL VIEWS AND OPINIONS AND NOTHING THAT I AM ATTEMPTING TO FORCE ON TO ANYONE, AND NOT AN ATTEMPTTO INFLUENCE ANYONE ELSE

@ Spice - not being disrespectful but I feel that you look down on or even scorn bw who solely deal with bm and I think you trivialise their reasons for doing so (Im not drawing this conclusion from this thread only, but from various ones that u've contributed to. Even if the thread has nothing whatsoever to do with sex, relationships etc you will find some way to mention that you date/f*** white (amongst other) men. Having said this I have had reason to agree totally with some of ur posts so Im not singling you out negatively or trying to be disrespectful towards you, just making some personal observations.

People, bottom line is this. I am happy with my BLACK man and Im sure many others are happy with their own black partners also. There are black men and women who are with non black partners of their choice. Really, negative views towards it or not, whether I agree or not, that is their choice. So me,although I do retain feelings regarding the matter, and do participate in discussions such as this, I concentrate on ME and MY man, and let others dictate their own destinys

One Love