c&j - extremely independent, had to be because I know I'm very stubborn.....couldn't give people the privilege of having to depend on them and holding back my journey/mission, but as I said, I recognised there's no place for individualism and independence when it comes to family and community...

Even now if I borrow money I'll borrow more for the covenience as opposed to the necessity i.e. I remeber seeing this house up for sale but was about 2k short, borrowing from a bredrin or girlfriend was a better option to selling my car or going to the bank as most don't do things like 1 month loans.

But yeah, always borrow from within the family or at least give them first refusal as a means of keeping that family tight - in fact I see holding out my hand to the chosen few as my way of strengthening our friendship - me approaching them for it means I see our union as bigger than my independence but know enough to know they're not necessarily seeing it the same way...which at the end of the day probably just boils down to the different ways we learnt about money.

I'm so independent the only things I didn't do were the things I expected a person of the feminine kind would feel deprived of if I did do it...but alas

Even so, for all my independence, my life of contrary meant it was a double edged sword, my individual success with all the salary hikes meant nothing if my people weren't there to enjoy it with me so squandered most of my life helping others in the belief the were also helping me reach our common destination...Africa...but alas...I've even been accused of trying to buy friends when effectively giving stuff away and working for free which puts us neatly back on topic in that I guess in todays climate I would have got shot.

MGL - this whole thing with all the news headlines is becoming a frigging circus.