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Reload this Page Corporal Punishment in the Home

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Corporal Punishment in the Home
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Default Corporal Punishment in the Home - 31-01-08, 10:07 PM

Yay or Nay

Did your parent(s) give you whoopings when you misbehaved as a child?

Will you/Do you do the same thing with your child(ren)?


As far as I am concerned - the black man's seed is GOLD and should not be abandoned wrecklessly © Femergy
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Default 31-01-08, 10:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Equanimity View Post
Yay or Nay

Did your parent(s) give you whoopings when you misbehaved as a child?

Will you/Do you do the same thing with your child(ren)?
Yes, and no. My kids are adults now, and I made it a point of principle not to lay my hands on them.


Mind your wants, 'cos somebody wants your mind
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Default 31-01-08, 11:24 PM

Why is that SoulRebal?!


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Default 31-01-08, 11:25 PM

I got whooped with everything under the son and it never did shit for me in the long run

I dont lay my hands on my son and probably will never lay hands on my daughter either




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Default 31-01-08, 11:45 PM

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Originally Posted by *$HaNnY_Bu* View Post
Why is that SoulRebal?!
One, because I have daughters, and there's no way I could reason that it was a sensible thing to do as a father.....two because I always figured that I could get my point across by communicating, and things worked out that way....and three, I didn't want my kids to have the same experience I did. Wouldn't say I was damaged beyond repair, but neither was it something I remembered fondly......


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Default 01-02-08, 10:33 AM

We got nuff hardcore licks when we were younger. But I realise now my parents were doing what they thought was right, its what was done to them and they turned out ok.

I can't say it did me any harm either, or my siblings, in all honestly that fear of what would happen if my dad found out stopped me from following my friends when they were getting up to all sorts.

I do give my boys the odd slap here and there when they should know better, and I have given my eldest a good beating once. Can't see it being necessary in the future, I don't even have to ground them anymore, they always respond to a good talking too.
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Default 01-02-08, 03:15 PM

I've changed my mind about this. I now believe that parents beating their children (for the generation above) is the result of some faulty programming from their parents.

I don't have any children, but if/when I do I wouldn't beat them or give them the odd clap etc.


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wink 01-02-08, 08:56 PM

If i'm being honest me and my brother did deserve it we were quite a handful..it served us well because we both left home as teenagers and those lessons served us in the wild wild west...well we were not abused we were disciplined my parents were not pyschos but we knew we had overstepped the mark
You know what made it stop??..when i was 13 or 14 that 'too cool for school age' thought to myself how can a cool dude be getting punishment at home i just stayed out of trouble even my parents thought this guy is too 'cool' to be talked down to at will...the problem was my parents just didn't want to understand our lives they acted like saints and i know my parents did a fair bit of partying you get to hear most of this as we adults now so we allowed to participate in mature conversations
Have no kids just yet but it would be a different pyschology to that of my parents because i know what goes on and i'm a very expressive person i tell my kids everything you get up to i know so just come correct and get your grounding...or the odd beating till they become 'too cool' ...
Nigerian upbringing comes with a lot of pressure as families are very competitive in hindsight it makes sense because you don't have too much time to indulge in nonsense or 'get bored' like the kids today....
One more thing before people get on the discipline is barbaric bandwagon kids in Public school still keep it traditional don't be fooled...wonder why they have impeccable manners still


one will need a bigger lie to cover the first one

Last edited by astmartins; 01-02-08 at 09:03 PM.
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Default 13-02-08, 08:58 AM

When I was a child I had a grandmother who I could outrun to get away from. But she always got to grips with the situation in the form of a severe beating.
In those days that was the only form of discipline those people knew. They came from a generation where 'children should be seen and not heard'. They didn't have the exposure to all the modern thoeries and ideas and a beating was all they knew to keep the child on the straight and narrow.
As a parent, I think that each child is unique and while one will listen when you say don't do such a thing and a talking is all it needs, another may be defiant and will need another method of training.
Discipline is another name for training and we all need that. By today's standards much of what was done in the name of discipline years ago would be classified as child abuse because excessive violence was used.
I would smack my child (open hand not closed fist) but in saying that I also respect my children enough for me to have a dialogue with them, to hear their opinions and views and reason with them first.
I see parents threaten and curse their children, drag, shove or pull them when they step out of line but most of the time in that instant what the parent is reacting to at that moment is their own anger and frustration.
Before I smacked mine I would tell them why and give them the chance to explain themselves. Smacking was always a last resort to unacceptable behaviour and was not used often but talking and explainations along with training them in life skills, manners, respect, and praising, encouragement and supporting them were also better methods of discipline.
Most of my cousins hate our grandmother for the beatings she gave them because she was exteme but I have had total strangers come up to me and tell me how pleasant and well mannered my children are. We have a relationship where the foundation for communication has been laid and we can talk.
It was based on mutual respect rather than threats of violence!

Last edited by sargaco; 13-02-08 at 09:02 AM.
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Default 13-02-08, 12:04 PM

i got beaten for merely disagreeing with my parents as well as for misbehaving. I will use corporal punishmennt in a measured fashion when I have kids and not justify it with a simple "I'm your parent so I can do what I like regardless". It hasn't done me harm but its not the answer for every misdemeanour.


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Default 13-02-08, 11:06 PM

I used to get disciplined like that up until about the age of 10. Some brothers got it worse. I remember back in primary school I had a friend who got a beaten in the street once. He ran home bawling. Thank God my mother never embarassed me like that. She kept that shit in the home (lol).


As far as I am concerned - the black man's seed is GOLD and should not be abandoned wrecklessly © Femergy
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