Ladies if you met this guy who you thought at first wasnt very handome and after getting to no him you found him to be the most kind hearted and caring guy that you have ever met would you consider dating him.

I know I'm not a lady but just to clarify for the sistas dem...

Are you talking ugly like Fat man scoop body with a mr fraiser face?





Or maybe just a likkle bit not handsome like a slightly big nose or funny looking chin or something... how hurt is the dude you're thinking of

To be honest if I am attracted to a guy despite his uncoventional looks then he becomes more attractive as time goes on, infact if anything I become appreciative of his looks.

Uniqueness you mention this guy is kind hearted and caring but do you find yourself attracted to him?, no point eating food if your not hungry.... Spark

I find this ugly people have hearts, beautiful people don't an utterlie.

Ugly face equals ugly soul.

Full stop.

no he is not that ugly at all infact nowhere near that his not that handsom but he has had girlfriends before so to me its something that you can look beyond as time goes by.But just at first when i met him i didnt think he was handsom but he aint freedy krugar ugly at all.

@ Uniqueness



Listen, if this guys looks is a real issue for you, it doesn't matter what anyone on here says about what they would do, because the 'physical attraction' thing will always be a barrier.

Face the facts. You think you should be more attracted to him because he is a really nice guy......BUT!.... you are not because his looksjust cause something deep inside you (i.e.DESIRE) to 'switch off' big time. You may feel bad because it makes you seem like one of these shallow individuals who is only interested in looks.......Maybe you are, maybe you are not, but no matter how many boxes this guy ticks, if he doesn't tick the one that is critical to turning on your 'I'm-hot-for-you' tap, it just isn’t going to work for you.

On the other hand, it can happen, and often does, that a person meets someone, who though they are not immediately drawn to from the point of 'physical attractiveness', butover timewhose 'character/personality/spirit' connectswith something inside them. Paradoxically,it has the affect that the person seems to get more attractive, though (in actuality) theirphysicallooksdo not change.

You see, it is all the qualities a person posseses which determine how 'attractive' they are, not just facial or bodily aesthetics. Much like a song you hear which you think is absolutely brilliant and gives you a glow every time you hear it. It does that because the whole scenario in which you heard that song (e.g. the situation you were in and the way you were feeling at the time) were just right. The song then becomes a catalyst thatbringsa reincarnation ofthat situation. Likewise, the face (that may not have touched you initially) becomes one of the most handsome/beautiful faces you have ever seen, because you now associate it with all those beautiful personal qualities that touch you deeply.

The thing is,you cannotdetermine for yourself which of the above twooutcomeswill apply in your case after that'not-so-attractive-initial-contact'...........it all comes down towhat is inside you!


Respect

... supposing you even caught him reading a copy of this:

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uniqueness wrote:
What do you mean by not very handsome?If it's "notvery handsome" as in he's average, then yes I would. But if it's "not very handsome" as in he's physically repulsive, then no. I value kind heartedness as well as intelligence but I also have to be able to look at the guy without cringing.

i know exactly what your talking about,im going through the same situation myself now,i met this guy and he is one of the best people ive ever met but i didnt find him that attractive at first but the more and more i talk to him and get to know him the more i do find him a little attractive,in my experience the men who are very handsome are too bigheaded and self centred,i mean basing everything on looks isnt a good way to go because eventually looks do fade lol and all you will be left with is the persons personailty,so i guess u have to ask yourself what is more important xxx

I have done this in the past because I saw a good man and didn't want to blow him off because I didn't want to feel like one of those shallow girls. I've learned that turning him down intially is better then me trying to make myself like him andplaying him later. Deep down inside I'm might respect him and see him as the type of man I want, just not him. If I let it go on, he will just get hurt in the long wrong so better off avoiding the whole situation if i'm repulsed by him regardless to his goodqualities.

uniqueness wrote: On a first date you aint meeting the person

You are meeting their representative