In an ideal world, the self-affirming declaration " I am a beautiful, natural Black Sistah" Beautiful natural Black Sistah a manifestation of kinky (some would say nappy hair or locks) full lips, broad nose and dark skin (we are a million and one shades manifesting black beauty) would be a proud mantra for all Black women that embrace such inner knowledge. So why now is the self-affirming legacy for Black women in the 21st century sown up in a Eurocentric ideal of what Black really is.

Are we as Black women guilty of allowing the plagarism of our true identity to now be marketed by a myriad of organizations that are bereft of any real understanding of our uniqueness as a influential and powerful community of souls?

Is it not enough for us to be proud of our natural features and embrace our natural beauty? or are we participating in our own annihilation?

We don't live in an ideal world! We live in a world that promotes European values as the only valid one and women buy into that because they don't stop and think that they are perhaps trying to accept for themselves, an unnatural form of beauty. An example is that the only forms of beauty I see promoted in many magazines is the Alicia Keys or Halle Berry type. Or if a black woman reaches the headlings she is wearing a weave ( therefore she must be discontented with her looks and want to conform to European standards of beauty or has embraced the European concept, therefore she is 'acceptable' because she recognises we Europeans are better. Once she does that she is not seen as a threat. We tolerate her). I don't see African features such as those of Alex Wek plastered all over bill boards or people aspiring to look like her because in many people's minds her features are ugly in juxtaposition to that of a European or a European looking black woman. It is mental conditioning and a sign of a people who are lost so they assimulate and assimulation comes in many different forms. Some think that by looking like the European they become liked, more acceptable. Some think that by looking more European they will get ahead.
I think that to accept another's concept and to let others dictate who we are is giving them our power.
Isn't true that if and when people wear their hair natural they are seen as rebellious or not conforming in otherwords a threat?

I read with great interest your views on my thread 'Elevation or Annihilation and found it very interesting as it is a very educated view about a very emotive subject and unfortunately not many of those in our race can tackle such a subject, a loaded one at that with such objectivity, so let me commend you firstly for that. I posted the topic because it is one very close to my heart as a conscious Black Sistah.

These are my findings, I agree with everything you've said, we are the makers of our own destiny, and at the same time have the power to destroy what ultimately the creator gave us naturally, that is our beauty, worldwide we are the largest consumers; as not only Black people, but Black women of beauty products, designed to harness and enhance that which we were naturally born with, we have to all intent and purposes immersed ourselves in the perpetuation of a culture of beauty that bears no resemblance to our own, and continually give props to a billion dollar industry that bears no real relation to how we as Black people and especially women see ourselves.

This is bourn out by the fact that our spiritual and mental philosophy is now shaped inwardly by an industry trying to sell us what it now means to be BLACK. Here's the bottom line, I am a Black woman, who is proud of the richness of my hue, and the fascination it still generates every day, by those who feel it necessary to try and dilute or water it down, I could give many instances of how the so-called 'beauty industry' is working to globalize, myth and stereotype, conjecture and falsity about our unique beauty as Black women, the instances are endless, and I write only to empower not to negate who we are as a race.

The absolute truth is that, as Black women, regardless of the depth of colour, regardless of the stereotypes the industry may try and bind to us, regardless of the billion dollar industry that is still trying to dilute who we are. Black will always be Black and there is a innate beauty in knowing that regardless of what the beauty industry tries to add or take away, true acknowledgement of just how much we are worth as a race, comes from within, yes, mentally, to a degree we have been brainwahed into believing that the more European you look, the easier your journey through life, yet creating our own agenda for beauty always has to be the key because it's ironic how buttock implants, lip implants and fake tans are on the increase for a large majority of European women, that in and of itself speaks volumes, we as Black women continue to set the standard/s for beauty without even trying can any other race attest whole-heartedly to that.

We as Black women will never have too far to go in terms of our empowerment if we embrace the fact, that we are unique, and truly beautiful because we are unique. To those Black women who don't want or who have not yet woken up to this fact it is time for the mentally elevated among us to sound the alarm.

Years ago, Black womanhood was caricatured in the media by the big fat black mammie types, only fit to take care of their white charges or cook in the kitchens. Later, it changed to the troubled drug addicted singer type. Nowadays, the caricature of Black womanhood is perceived through the media as a wig/weave wearing loose immoral being. The caricature has not changed much from the earlier one of half naked savage exposing her breasts and shaking her rear end, only now her grass skirt has been replaced by a bikini or a skin tight mini dress, and on her head she wears a weave. She is seen happy and contented, just to be part of a harem, bumping and grinding in cars or shaking her stuff around enjoying the delights of revelry.
This loose, immoral, exotic, and hedonistic Black woman is the type that is portrayed to us on a daily basis (in the video's) and is one which most of our men also buy into because they themselves have been conditioned to think on a superficial level; to think that flitting from woman to woman is the source of happiness, that the body beautiful is everything. Women also buy into this. A man's morals don't come into it so long as he looks good or he can 'do it right'. But they soon realise that it is the strength of a person's character is the prerequisite to happiness. We have been conditioned and therefore, we accept the superficial nature of people, relationships, and appearance.
A few days ago I was out shopping and ther was a little child, no older that 9 or 10 shopping with her mother. Some 'bwoy' not much older than herself was trying to 'check'her' not once or twice, telling her that he likes her and isn't she interested. The girl just blanked him, the mother did nothing to intervene and just carried on buying her shoes.
The point is, rather than thinking about an education or being a child, he, at the age of ten is already displaying a preditor's mentality. It does not take much stretch of the imagination to see where he will be in a few years time.
On another day, I saw three girls, one no older that 14 with a big belly. Once again, her education has stopped and what can she possibly give to a child in terms of guidance or economic stability?
I have a teenage daughter and I do not allow her to watch programmes that degrade a woman's sexuality because too much media exposure to those images can make her take in the negativity of Afrikan womanhood.
If that is what is presented to us, as to who we are, then we take it in, albeit, unconsciously and act it out. I also warn her against the type of men that have no substance to their character, other than the worship of their own phalluses and who see women as potential worshipers of that phallus, only to be discarded when they have had their pleasure. I come across such men every day. Outwardly, they may be attractive looking but inside, they are lethal, they drag you down psychologically, and some of them are potential death traps, talking 'bout 'Baby I like you' as it that is supposed to flatter me, when in reality, all they want to do is to make me another in a long line of conquests.
In a round about way, what I am saying is that by not seeing Afrikan womanhood in any other terms that the sexual energiser bunny mode, we lose sight as to what true womanhood is all about and we certainly lose sight as to what true masculinity is about. Because the one that is being offered up to us, and which many men perpetuate and we accept, is the rakish philandering type: the Mandingo's the Lothario's,and Casanova's. Yeah, I know all you players, know where I am coming from.
By not taking responsibility for our own identities, and by being complacent, by allowing ourselves to be swayed by media hype, a lack of community, and selfishness, our OWN moral degeneration is leading to annihilation. Remember, we are either part of the problem or part of the solution. Therefore, how we define ourselves as Afrikan women should not be dictated by the white media or brain washed irresponsible men folk, but by our own dignity, self-respect and self worth.

how i wear my hair on my head has got nothing to do with my level of 'blackness' i understand that there are some naomi campbell wannabes who only date white men and slate black men but that is not me.

i wear my hair relaxed but i have had many styles, braiding, cornrows, curly braids, striaght braids and straight weaves.

today i am wearing a short sleeved blouse with linen shorts that come just below my knees. i do not feel like i degrade myself by the way i dress, my friends dress modestly also. i am 24 and i do not have children, none of my friends have children.

i have been to black panther meetings with my weave - no-one there has ever challenged me. i went to a malcom x commemoration not long ago with my weave. malcolm x's own daughter has relaxed hair.

lets stop this generalisation, not every black woman who wears weaves are trying to be white.

Well said...

1st Class observation and commentary.......

Hmmm.....

If you wear a weave, you may not be trying to be white, but your not trying to be black either are you!?

When I think of white women i think of blonde hair, many many white women without blonde hair dye their hair to look like the 'perfect' white woman.

When I think of Chinese/Indian ladies i think of bone straight black hair, not many of them deviate from this normality.

When I think of latino women i see long brown curly hair. Google latino female celebs you'll not find many without this trademark.

Black Women?? I see anything but what is naturally for us - an Afro. Also missing from the list of hairstyles you have had. Ask yourself WHY you have NEVER had your hair the way god intedned it to be. WHY NOT??

Common...you cannot be serious....So what next? Now that we know one of Malcolm's duaghter had a child with "green eyed" Algerian, would it be then ok with you if some of us started dating Arabs?

What she does with her hair does not make it ok for you to do the same, just because she is Malcolm's daughter, it doesn't mean she knows better or is there to set precedents on whats wrong or right.

There is no point bringing in other people's reaction or non reaction to your choices. In the past, i did go to a few Pan African meetings with my hair in all sorts, ofcourse out of politeness they said nothing to my face. Like wise their silence si simply a sign of them simpy being welcoming without preaching to you strightaway about your hair.


One thing i do agree with you though is this, not all black women who wear weaves are trying to be white. However, one thing is for sure, they are not being themselves either.

Mary J Blige is a good example of the psychological damages some of our sistas have.

Listen to the video footage from this Tyra Banks show , at around 3:28 minutes Tyra asks her " If a fairy came down and granted you one wish , what would it be"?


Mary J Blige replied " To have long hair, to have long wavey Indian hair....I have always wanted that,,,I have always wanted GOOD HAIR"

Terrence Says: Mary J. Blige Wants "Good Hair"!

@ mezmerized

i'm not saying that what is good for her is good for me. i mentioned her because when people want to talk about blackness they like dropping names like malcolm x in it and i'm thinking well his wife straightened her hair, while he was preaching about us not liking our hair. why didnt he choose someone with an afro...because your hair is not a reflection of who you are.

@ melissa

i dont strive to be anyone but myself. we need to stop trying to define 'blackness' by our own standards. there are many 'natural' sisters out there married to YT men. does that make them any more black than me?

my grandmother's hair was and is still very long, more than half way down her back, my cousin's hair is also half way down her back it is not relaxed or pressed, she wears it in twists and has been from we were young (she is now 30). but she is considering relaxing it. My best friend also has long hair and my hair nearly reaches the middle of my back so no i dont equate long hair with indian or white people because i grew up around family members with long hair. if any of them straighten their hair and it happens to be long are they trying to be white?

no i do not wear an afro because i don't want to wear an afro. why should i? everyone black should have an afro? everyone chooses a style that suits them, whether it fits their personality or lifestyle. it does not make anyone more conscious.

that's like walking around with a badge on saying i am black. i do not need to 'advertise' that i am conscious by wearing my hair in a certain way. also i do love my hair, at the moment i am trying to make it healthy as i have done a lot to it. so i am protecting it by doing various styles. when i go on holiday i may do cornrows or single plaits. because i do a more 'natural' style i am not putting my 'black' hat on, i will still be the same person. i know who i am and that's all that matters. there may be other ways that i show that i am conscious.

Shop- you didn't answer the question.

You seem preoccupied with what everyone else does to their hair, as if it is some sort of validation. Its not. And what does the length of hair have to do with anything? Nobody said only white people have long hair.

I have had my hair in various styles also for variety esp when I was younger. But unlike you, I also rocked my natural hair. I haven't had anything but for years now.

So I am not questioning why you relax or wear weaves, a hairstyle does not make you 'black'. The question I am asking is - WHY DO YOU NOT WEAR YOUR HAIR NATURAL??

Can you answer that question honestly?

Saying 'why should i' or 'it won't make me more conscious' speaks volumes. So does ' it doesn't suit me or go with my personality'.

If your NATURAL hair that growss out of your scalp doesn't suit your personality, that would mean your persona is fake - just like your hair! Think about it.