[J.Jewel]

What do you think about this statement?
As the child is of Caribbean/White dual heritage we felt that rather than allowing the child to be brought up by a loving Grandmother of white origin living in a predominantly white area the child should be adopted and live in London area so as to have greater link with Black Heritage! Does this seem wrong to you or smack of segregation or am I being over sensitive?

[Kunjufu]

Originally Posted by J.Jewel

What do you think about this statement?
As the child is of Caribbean/White dual heritage we felt that rather than allowing the child to be brought up by a loving Grandmother of white origin living in a predominantly white area the child should be adopted and live in London area so as to have greater link with Black Heritage! Does this seem wrong to you or smack of segregation or am I being over sensitive?

I take it this quote comes from a social work report, for the courts...underpinning a decision to have the child in a same race adoptive family. Setting aside the fact the usually i agree with same race adoptions, and that this is but a small excerpt of the report taken out of context...

that said the above paragraph does not make sense and cannot in my opinion evidence a decision of that magnitude... for the following reasons: Whilst the majority of blacks do live in London, I do not see how living amongst other black people would by itself provide a link to one heritage.. that is at best a superficial argument that doesn't hold water.. It would also be interesting to note what is meant by 'black heritage' and how this would be maintained by living in London?


However I can also see the argument depending on the area, of how being isolated can have an adverse effect on a black child.. My key spar, was such a child and i know through his pain that he really struggled when he tried to re-socialise with his peers as a teenager.. However the difference then to now i would have said is that the climate is different now in terms of black presence in the media, in music and educational material.. So I'm not sure the isolation argument stands up these days.

To balance my comments if i were writing this report my argument would be based on my view on how best to equip this child to function socially and to have the best chance to forfil their potential educationally, with tight parental boundaries. Love or the illussion of love would not be a criteria i would use for placing a child... My criteria would be the person's ability to parent now and more importantly in the future....and to be educated properly. If that is with you J.jewel then the above argument is to put it bluntly lazy... if not then J.jewel the social worker who wrote the rubbish should have been professionally ability to better evidence their view, spelling out in clear terms why their decision is in the 'BEST INTEREST' of the child.. that view should be transparent and underpinned with clear evidence why you are not the best option for the child...

As painful as it might be to you that is what should have happened, if it didn't then your job if i'm gonna be blunt is to now ensure what ever plans they have is in your grandchild's best interest and is properly thought out and robust... if not you should be attacking that and not get stuck on seeing this as a slight on you or your ability as a parent...

[Incognito]

At least the Americans were honest enough to give it a name as opposed to trying to use rhetoric and diplomacy or that English stiff upper institutionalised racist lip to say the same thing. Still we should be grateful, when the white blood in these offspring paves the way to genius, inventions and financial wealth, we get to claim them as our own

New Life for the "One Drop" Rule

"The United States is the only country in the world in which a white mother can have a black child but a black mother cannot have a white child."


You were deemed black if either of your parents were. Indeed, you were deemed black even if your only black ancestor was one great-grandparent — the infamous "one drop" rule made it so.

Being part-black was as inconceivable as being part-pregnant. Nor was there room in this scheme for people with other racial identities; those who were not white were thrown into the category of "Negroes and other races." Under this system, if you recognized the remarkably mixed ancestry of a Tiger Woods, what public school would you assign him to? Where would you have him sit in the bus?

[rachie]

Up until the age of eight i grew up in a very multicultural area and went to a very multicultural school right in the heart of East London. I was very happy there in this school. My parents moved to a more upmarket place when i was 8 and although i got on ok i did prefer where i was i just felt more at ease there. I am casting my head back to my childhood days now and remembering how i felt.

I assume that this child’s grandmother is the child’s blood relative. You did not mention any family that the child could live with in London. I don't think that hardly anyone would say that the child should go and live in London if that is the case.

Dual heritage to some people can be a bit confusing a lot of black people who are growing up or grew up in the UK may see themselves as dual heritage.

[Black_Power]

stay with the child

family is always best..besides it sounds like just want to get rid of the "blackness" that is your grandchild and let someone else deal with the problem.

[J.Jewel]

Dont think people realise that a parents or Grandparents love is colour blind. A child is a child and how you view the child is a direct link to how they view themselves. Nobody on this Earth can love that child in the same way as a biological parent that is of sound mind and body. I may be ignorant to practices of their Caribbean ancestry but I have a tongue and active mind in my head. Even the childs Father has little knowledge of his history( I question him incessantly) so I read posts on this site and gain a greater knowledge of what it is like from the Black prospective, not pretending I understand it all but will ask if need to clarify. Just like my Grandsons I also need education so I can teach.

[LadyDay]

children should they not be at risk should always be with blood relatives. regardless

[Kunjufu]

Originally Posted by LadyDay

children should they not be at risk should always be with blood relatives. regardless

to be honest the rule is that children should be placed or remain with family whenever possible..so I'm at a lost why they would do the opposite and take this child away from their grandparents to live in London... When most sane Black people are moving their children OUT of London... It would be interesting to know what area this S/workers work in...whether they are bLACK or WHITE because I'm puzzled!!

[Afriki]

you say the child is dual heritage? So....wouldn't they be even closer to at least part of their true heritage if they stay with their family line?
Is this even a real case to be considered by a court? Doesn't seem like it. Maybe there's something up with the grandmother or living conditions? No way the court would take a child away from it's family because of something like this.

[Kunjufu]

Originally Posted by Afriki

you say the child is dual heritage? So....wouldn't they be even closer to at least part of their true heritage if they stay with their family line?
Is this even a real case to be considered by a court? Doesn't seem like it. Maybe there's something up with the grandmother or living conditions? No way the court would take a child away from it's family because of something like this.

Actually Afriki the cour will be guided by the SW reports and reports from other proffessionals who will direct it as to the child's 'best interest'... and to be honest grandparents have no more rights than you would to the child...unfortunately!!

[J.Jewel]

I have an 8yr old Grandson ,half sibling to new Grandson , who is of Dual Heritage already living with me. The Mother of both has had problems with drugs etc and as reports destroyed by Social Services they are presuming her problems are down to my parenting skills but in my defence I have 4 children and only one has chosen this lifestyle I am being blamed for. They are bringing up the "better off in London" and other excuses to back up the fact that they want to have child adopted. As it is an ongoing case I cannot say too much but can assure you that the accusations etc flying about have no basis in truth and are being twisted to fit their version of truth. Cant wait to get whole story off my chest once all over but hands are tied for now but can assure you that my Grandsons welfare is paramount to me and I am not doing this out of a sense of guilt or obligation.

[sargaco]

When our children are young we teach them right from wrong, amongst all the other skills for life. When they reach a certain age some stop listening and make their own choices, influenced by whatever.
Parents cannot be held responsible if their adult children make bad choices. If your child is not living under your roof, you cannot influence it if it has chosen a wayward life style. The best you can do is encourage and support them in the right choices and not condone the destructive ones.
The mere fact that you have raised other children and their choices were different testifies to that. I would not accept that slur. I have known many social workers who themselves have come from places of dysfunction.
I would prefer to stay with my blood relatives (so long as they were not dysfunctional), rather than a stranger who I have no blood ties or connection with, other than the colour of my skin. When I was training there was much emphasis put on political correctness and the human element of the situation was overlooked.
I can understand if there was no one willing to care for the child within its birth family. But the stupidity of it is that when that child reaches a certain age they are able to look for their real family. Now, if idenitiy was not such an important issue that law would not be in force. Why take away a child's identity and sense of self and belonging in its formative years when those things are very important and only when the child is an adult; when all of the time has lapsed for it to be damaged, then turn around and say: right you now have the right to look for your biological folks. Is it me or is there something fundamentally wrong?

[mike pain]

i'm pretty sure the person or persons that made the decision to stick the Biracial child with a black family was white...in fact i'd bet good money on it....

[J.Jewel]

The couple who may adopt if i'm not successful in getting guardianship order are white and they have adopted my white Grandchild. But they do live in London ,a factor the services find highly important according to statements,obviously dont know which area but do know they're middle class and I worry the lack of knowledge about working class roots is also an issue . I am very proud of my English/Scottish/Irish and Welsh roots (we're what our family call "Heinz 57" we come in many varieties) My Children know their roots and I will do everything to make sure that my Dual Heritage Grandchildren will know also. Sites like this one are certainly helping me understand as an "outsider" and will help give the boys an all round pride in who they are and where they came from.