Sometimes I hate my baby! - Page 2

Diamond Mum · (#26 (**permalink**))

Apedemak wrote:

Quote:

Is it that you hate thebaby or hate yourself for not being able to tend to it?... Hate seeing it in agony and not knowing whats wrong?

I know of a girl who 'hates' her baby even though its unborn. She got pregnant loosely, the father isn't around and she just wants to do her thing, mixed with the hormones of pregnancy and the stress of having to work while shes heavily in I can seehernot wanting to be pregnant at times blaming the baby for her actions amidst her worries of not being able to cope as a mother and all that.... also know that the woman married to my uncle (not related)felt so let down by him and his trips to Ibiza that she'd drink while pregnantto spitehim, blaming baby for what she can't cope with as a parent.

(Was a doctor/psyciatrist in another life.)

I find that sometimes people find it harder to admit there mistakes and are quick to pass the blame onto someone else. we all know babies just dont pop into people's belly, but when all incidents evolve around the baby (born or not), people are fast to blame it. when truth be told, the baby never asked to be there.

babies can either bring out the best of the worst in people!

CeeCee · (#27 (**permalink**))

Ethos,

Although I have never had kids, I sympathize with you. I've heard some women utter the same words you have because being a mother is serious and taxing work. Being a new mom , you're coming down to reality and unfortunately part of reality is that once the baby is here, you're time will have to make some agonizing sacrifices that will take up you're time. I also think that you may have fallen in love with the idea of having baby, buy maybe not grasping to the realities of raising one. It doesn't bad mom because of it. Feel good to know that some women do develop the same feelings of that. I also wonder could you feel that way because of your husband. With all dur respect, I don't totally agree with his suggestion. A baby need BOTH ofbaby's parents. I promise you one thing, if he isn't as involved in that child's life--even for six months , he's going to regret it when that child wonder why does that child like mom better than he?

Anyways, it's a good thing that you are talking about it. There are women who don't and some of these woman end up doing something drastic for keeping their feelings bottled up. I don't think you hate your child and I don't picture you as being abusive, you're just angry because you cannot be as free as you once were. If you're having problems coping with motherhood, you should ask your folks how did they cope with being with those 14 kids( and I commend that also) and what did they do, and ask for their help if possible. Considering that this is your first child, most new mothers get some kind of temporary assistance from their parents or love one. I also think that your husband should be more open minded and sympathetic to you and work in conjunction with you.There are just as many new fathers as there are new mothers mother who do.

Some newborn mothers also suffer from post-partum stress disorder . Not to say that you fit that category, but some of those same woman have also had those same feelings of deep despair like you. If you feel that your problem getting worse and that those urges gnawing at your foot, maybe you shoud seek a counselor about it in case it could be that.