Im 5 mths pregnant at the moment and Im wondering whether or not to introduce a dummy. Ididnt use one with my firstbutI took a year off workso I didnt mindthe sleepless nights (i noticed she would sometimes use me as a dummy/pacifier) however this time I can only afford to take 6 months off. My 2 yr old niece seems to sleep better at night with a dummy but she has also become dependant on itand her teeth are a sort of funny shape.

Whats your views?

both my nephews had dummies, but they weened themselves off of them of their own accord. I guess if your child never has one, they can't miss it confused3either way, i think its important to ween them off it before their teeth start to grow. Sayng that, it's probably best not to give them one in the first place. If a baby needs that kind of "comfort" they will probably just suck their thumbs as they do that in the womb anyway. But that is harder to stop than a dummy, which you can throw away!!

offtopic.gifwhen i was in primary school i knew a boy who sucked his two fingers up until what we now call year 6. Don;t know if he continued it in secondary school!

SayNO to dummies! They serve no constructive purpose whatsoever for the development of the child and just ruins gum and teeth development as well as getting the child (potentially) on to the whole 'addiction' thing from young.

No child needs a dummy.

Respect

No one can tell you whether to give a dummy or not it is down to you, there are pros and cons to it and you have to weigh the option out yourself,

I voweled not to use a dummy, then when my son alwasys cried when i pu t him in the push chair i tried it, but he never used it, he still today thinks a dumy is a toy not a comforter, and he does not finger suck, or tongue suck, his bottle has always been a comforter...

A little secret i still suck my thumb and so does my baby's father... we are both in our twenties, and i know a lot of adults who do it, Usually it is grown out of, unlike the dummy, but it serves a good purpose!!

Dont worry about it, you will deside what ever is best for you when the time comes until then just enjoy being pregnant

Of course no one can tell you whether to give up a dummy or not, unless you are in the habit of taking orders from cyber strangers. However, the thread poster did ask for people to give their views and in my view no child needs a dummy.

Sure, parents may find it a convenience for keeping a crying child quiet, just the same way many parents find sticking the child in front the telly a convenient way of keeping them occupied (as opposed to say, playing with them) whilst they get on withwork around the house, orwhatever. However,a convenience is not the same as a need. A dummy serves no purpose whatsoever fromthedevelopmental aspect of raising a child, and if you as a parent (who of course is free to choose) so choose to give your child a dummy, it will not be on the basis that the child needs one, but more than likely, because you do......so as to be able to get some piece and quiet whilst Eastenders is on, possibly.

@ Specialle

Is thepractice of 'sucking your thumb'something you would advocate then.....for adults and children alike?

Respect

@backatya



sucking fingers and thumb... well its not somethng id would encourage, neither is it something i would discourage...

many more people suck there tongue which quite often goes un-noticed...

and many people try the dummy to comfort a child, i know i did.. when my son was distressed, and i couldnt calm him, i tried to introduce the dummy (somewhat unsuccessfully), the dummy also known as a comforter and arguable every child NEEDS to be comforted in times of distress, maybe no child needs a dummy but they all need comfort and for some babies and children as well as parents a dummy is the prefered choice.

I supposed the difference between a finger, thumb or tongue sucker, the child find it themselves rather than being given by the parent, and is therefor a natural reflex for the child.

tbh was never a fan of freud in school buthis theory on thepsychosexual oral stage of development does kinda make you think.

The oral stage of development (0-2years) based on children exploring the world by putting things into their mouths, sucking, biting and swallowing. The conflict to be resolved is being weaned off breastfeeding. This can happen too abruptly and too suddenly or too slowly leading to two personality types.

The Oral receptive personality is preoccupied with eating/drinking and reduces tension through oral activity such as eating, drinking, smoking, biting nails. They are generally passive, needy and sensitive to rejection. They will easily 'swallow' other people's ideas.
The Oral aggressive personality is hostile and verbally abusive to others, using mouth-based aggression

Called Oral fixation. I definately think dummies exacebate the problems of oral fixation

my son never had a dummy. i didnt really let him use me as a dummy either. he doesnt suck his fingers only in the day when his gums are itching

panther1977 wrote:

What does your husband suggest?

Look, when you've had nosleep for DAYS ON END, because you're child uses your breast as a comforter, meaning you can't 1) go to the toilet and 2) eat and drink anything other than finger food, then you can tell me not to give a dummy to my child.

My husband actually suggested it...I was too tired to even remember my name by this point. Both he and I were both very anti, but until you're in the situation you can't judge.

I think it depends on the child. My first son didn't have one (he has a noo-noo - at 7!!!), my daughter did (weaned herself off at 18 months), and I'm hoping to get this one off it soon. The fact that he keeps throwing it around the place, only wanting it when he wants to sleep hopefully means we won't have to wait too long.

Panther,

Congrats on your pregnancy, but don't think about it just yet. Trust me, you have enough to think about right now, and it's a minor t'ing. That said, if you and Hubby want to introduce it more power to you, don't beat yourself up about it. Parenthood is a minefield anyway.

Good luck!

@backatya

Think of it this way,... baby formula and bottle was invented, and with that children can be feed and nuttured with out the breast, many of whom would die without it cas unfourtunatly not all mothers ca breast feed for various reason, it is used...

Theathing rings came a bout to comfort a child gums when in distress, it is used

and so many others we cant say if some1 didnt invent ------ cas if people didnt invent well we would be in the stone age still...

In some cases i will argue a dummy is needed, because, everybody has stress threshholds... If a dummy stops them from murdering a child that child needs a dummy for pure survival...

some people cant handle the crying, and it heard all too often about a mum killing her baby or leaving it in a dumpster or at some1s door step

Ur child may not need one but, if u were to have another opinions might change...

specialle wrote: Hi Specialle

I don't know I would put a dummy in the same 'needs' bracket as feeding bottles, which dispenses food (quite essential to life)...but still.

Anyway the fact is we seem to have a different definition as to what a need is, so at the end of the day you would claim a dummy is needed in certain casese where I would claim (and do) that it is never needed, but comes down to a matter of personal preference, choice or (as you put it) stress threshold. Though the 'stress threshold' thing highlights the reason why you the parent may need a dummy, rather than why the child itself needs it....lol

I don't know if I quite buy the 'saving more children from getting murdered' justification, but hey, who can say what the child mortality rate would be if not for dummies.....lol

Incidentally, I have 5 children. The first one had a dummy and the rest did not. It was the experience of giving it to the first that convinced me (p