[align=center]Do you remember the Baby Girl[/align]
[align=center]Who seemed to make your cold heart swell[/align]
[align=center]With raven hair and chocolate eyes[/align]
[align=center]And tiny hands and Baby sighs.[/align]
[align=center][/align]
[align=center]Do you remember the words you said[/align]
[align=center]You held her tightly in our bed[/align]
[align=center]And whispered, Yes I;m here for you[/align]
[align=center]Were all your promises untrue.[/align]
[align=center][/align]
[align=center]When Xmas lights that shine and glow[/align]
[align=center]Remember the girl you hardly know[/align]
[align=center]And is she happy, maybe sad[/align]
[align=center]Without the man she calls her Dad.[/align]
[align=center][/align]
[align=center]And if you wake at night in bed[/align]
[align=center]Do thoughts of her invade your head[/align]
[align=center]Do words you said cut like a knife[/align]
[align=center]"I have a girl, she changed my life".[/align]
[align=center][/align]
[align=center]Or were you always insincere[/align]
[align=center]Afraid to love what you held dear[/align]
[align=center]The man I knew wore such disguise[/align]
[align=center]And like a fool I believed the lies.[/align]
[align=center][/align]
[align=center]Though days are short and nights are long[/align]
[align=center]My love for her will keep her strong[/align]
[align=center]And though it may be sad, its true[/align]
[align=center]You lost a sacred part of you.[/align]

@ locsgrl :

OUTSTANDING POEM MY SISTA !blkclap

@Fredblack.

Thank you for that, it means a lot to me to know that you recceived it in the way it was meant. I could never be a Bitter person because I see that there are reasons and lessons to be learned in Everything. I could not be bitter towards this man because, in the long run he has given me a precious gift of my daughter. But one night, when I wrote that poem, I was sitting watching her sleep and I felt such an incredible sadness. I wondered how a person goes on in life knowing they have this little girl, and never seeing her or being part of her life. If you start contemplating that issue, then more emotion rises to the surface and before you know it....you have a poem in your head. "Better out than in" my old Gran used to say!

@Fatimah

Thank you very much! Your appreciation is much appreciated!

HESAID!

Thank you. xx

I agree with the previous comments, this is a loving poem.Objectively,you deal with a personal topic to which many people can relate. With warmth, not anger youshow how the absent father isthe one who has lost out



[align=center]"And though it may be sad, its true[/align]


[align=center]You lost a sacred part of you."[/align]
You also seek to understand the father's absence, suggesting that he might be scared to assume his fatherly duties. This makes the separation of father from his beautiful daughter all the more poignant.

As Fredblack said it's powerful.

@Ayousha

Thank you for your comments on my poem. I;m glad you liked it. blkrainbowfro

@ Locsgirl,

I don't see how I could have missed this. This is beautiful, heartfelt and touching.

As a woman who's father was never in her life, I can certainly relate. One of my favorite lines....

And is she happy, maybe sad


Without the man she calls her Dad.



It was a struggle for me personally (even though there were other male models in my life, my late-grandfather, my uncles...) but I made it through. Some people say you don't miss what you never had but in a case like this one does. Girls need their fathers as do boys, I just wish men who walk away from their responsibility really understood that.

I give you a big thumbs up for this piece. Wow!niceone.gif

@Ashanti

Thank you very much for your appreciation. Hope you dont mind me asking you this but did you ever meet your Dad in adult life? Also do you feel not having a Dad has changed the way you relate to men as an adult? I;m asking this because this is the sort of thing that worries me for the future. I;m not idealistic though, I know that no Dad is better than a bad one.

Thanks Ashanti niceone.gif

@Locsy

Wouldn't expect anything else from a sensitive person as yourself........very touching...nearly missed it as well.niceone.gif

locsgirl wrote:
I have no problem at all answering your question especially if it can be of some assistance. I never met him in adult life and that will never happen now. He died 5 years ago, the same year I lost my grand-father who was more like a dad to me. That year was unforgettable and very ironic.

You know in all honesty I harbored a deep resentment for him for many years especially when I learned that he was living just across town for us...and there we were struggling big time, barely making ends meet and what not. He had many issues though, alcoholism, was among them plus he was a vietnam vet. For many years I didn't even know his full name even though I knew what he looked like because I saw him a few times as a child.
The sad thing about it Locsgirl is that my mother is such a wonderful, intelligent, woman, who left the door wide open for him to visit me and my sister...there was none of the drama you see and hear about now-a-days with restraining orders and such, plus she never said an un-kind word to us about him...he just flat out refused to have anything to do with us. That cuts to the core of a child's soul. And I am and always will be forever wounded. That area will always be void and never filled. I can live with that. I realize that now but when I was younger I couldn't see it.
The difficult thing is balancing what the first man in my life did to me and making sure I don't transfer that unto other males in my life because as we all know not everyone is the same.

For a while I had trust issues. No one was allowed to get close to me because I feared being hurt again. But it took me a very long time to come to terms with that, years in fact. I let the bitterness over take me and although I was successful as a adult, very driven, career-oriented, the one place (emotionally), I long to progress in didn't happen for a while.
Some female children who don't have fathers take the other route of being promiscuous, trying to feel the void of never having a man's love. For me everyone was off limits, LOL!

But I agree with you totally when you say that no dad is better than a bad one. You are so on the money with that because I see so many single mothers make the mistake of letting their children be anywhere near a man who has no redeeming value or qualities let alone any business reproducing. A young, impressionable child doesn't need a person with drama and serious issues around them. Your act definitely has to be together when you are raising a child.

But even after saying all of that, I would implore anyone who is not in their children's life to at the very minimum, write them a letter to be opened when they can comprehend it, stating why you chose to leave or be absent...this can help eleviate some of the wondering why, the pining for your acceptance, your love, your acknowledgement and last but certainly not least the excrutiating pain of being rejected at such an early age.

To this day, I still don't know why, because he took the answer to the grave with him but now that I look back...it isn't so much as what I missed out on as much as what he missed.
He missed seeing two hurt little girls grow up to be smart, strong, successful, compassionate, married women...He missed our graduations from high school and college, He missed our weddings, He missed my sister becoming a government worker, he missed my becoming a journalist as well as giving birth to his first and only grand-child.
So all in all, it was his loss but you know it can only be a loss if the person ever cared and I don't know that and I never will.

When I learned of his death, I cried. I cried because I felt I had been robbed all over again. You see I had always dreamt of confronting him to get an answer. But now that wasn't going to ever happen.

The things we unnecessarily endured as children were unforgivable but in order for me to get on with my life, I had to let the hatred go. They say forgiveness is the gift we give ourselves and that is so true.
So when I finally forgave him, it was more about me than it was about him because afterwards I suddenly felt this burden, this weight lifted from my heart. Too bad he couldn't be here physically to see the moment in which it happened but hey, I only played the hand I was dealt.

Sorry to be so long winded, LOL! I hope that helps.blkbiggrin

@Ashanti

Thank you for such an eloquent and honest reply. It does help hearing your story because obviously I worry about these same issues.

I know a young woman whose Father died of a heroin overdose when she was eight months old. I knew her then and still know her now, and she;s twenty years old. She is amazing and very close to her Mother who she adores. But she is Fuming about her Father! How could he be so selfish as to just go off and score heroin, knowing he had a young baby to love and live for? Not many people remember him, so she talks to me about him a lot. She will Not take on board any positive thing I can say about him, and I do try. They say there is a lesson in everything we go through in life. This young woman is So anti-drugs...alcohol and all chemical abuse. She is very independant and responsible and always has been. Maybe this is the spiritual lesson she came here to learn...maybe he was her Teacher.

And maybe you will be exactly the right person to help someone else who has been in your shoes, but is not handling the situation very well.

My daughter, like yourself has a wonderful Grandfather to love her. She also has a Big brother of nineteen to tease and play with her. She has loads of attention from his friends too. There are So many children in her position now that she doesn;t feel so different at school. In fact(and I know this sounds bad) at school last year they didn;t make Fathers Day cards because so many children dont have one. Sad but true!

Thanks Ashanti for being so open and honest...You;re a Great Sista niceone.gif



@Mafdet

And Thank you too Sista for your appreciation niceone.gif

Locsgirl, you are more than welcome.blkthumbsup

Ashanti wrote: