Was it wrong of me to leave him?

So, I told my best friend of more than 3 years that I needed to distance myself away from him for a while on the phone. I like him more than a friend but he is engaged to his girlfriend. We are both 21. I also told him I have no idea when I will ever contact him. I am depressed and hurt because I rather not ruin his relationship than tell him I really like him. I want him to forget about me.

He called me, but I refused to pick it up. He left a message on the answering machine to please call him and that he loves me like a sister and if he does not hear from me in a week he will try to see me and may have his people search for me! He just kept calling and calling.

I just can't do it anymore people. He is so attached to me, but I am not his girlfriend. Sometimes, I wish I had never met him despite wonderful emotional memories with him. We have very similar tastes and can read each other minds, but I am the one who is always alone. I am the one who is always depressed.

Therefore, I decided to leave him. I cannot continue to cry every night.

Thanks for the reply, but there is no point. He IS marrying his girlfriend (it's official). That's why I said "engaged." I need to focus on my life, that's why I need to distance myself from him.

[align=center]If [/align]
[align=center][/align]
[align=center]If I could find the words to tell you[/align]
[align=center]Just how you make me feel…….[/align]
[align=center]If I could show you by my actions[/align]
[align=center]Would You really know the deal[/align]
[align=center]If I could muster the courage[/align]
[align=center]To take your hand in mine[/align]
[align=center]And step with you on a journey[/align]
[align=center]to another place In time.[/align]
[align=center][/align]
[align=center]If I could say the words[/align]
[align=center]“baby, I want you as more than my friend�[/align]
[align=center]would you open your arms and embrace me?[/align]
[align=center]Or would this friendship end?[/align]
[align=center]If I told you that when you smile[/align]
[align=center]I just wanna to draw you close[/align]
[align=center]And feel each groove of your body[/align]
[align=center]plant kisses on your nose.[/align]
[align=center][/align]
[align=center]Would you believe me if I told you[/align]
[align=center]Dreams of you fill my sleep?[/align]
[align=center]Visions so perfect[/align]
[align=center]That during my waking hours I keep.[/align]
[align=center]Would you understand me if I told you[/align]
[align=center]That I feel your every pain[/align]
[align=center]Watched you move from woman to woman[/align]
[align=center]And never…… to your gain[/align]
[align=center][/align]
[align=center]And If I’ve been before you so long[/align]
[align=center]Why have you never noticed me?[/align]
[align=center]Your sister, your friend, your confidant [/align]
[align=center]Is there nothing else you see?[/align]
[align=center]I need to be more than the friend you turn to[/align]
[align=center]When things don’t go your way[/align]
[align=center]I wanna be by your side at night[/align]
[align=center]And in your thoughts by day[/align]
[align=center][/align]
[align=center]So if I tell you……..I’m a woman first,[/align]
[align=center]Maybe the one carved from your rib[/align]
[align=center]If you look at me, with fresh eyes [/align]
[align=center]Maybe we could just adlib[/align]
[align=center]Move this friendship to a different level, [/align]
[align=center]let nature take it’s course[/align]
[align=center]If you and me were together[/align]
[align=center]There would be no remorse.[/align]

not a easy position to be in sis.

If your friend has a woman - you, as his friend need to respect that. If stepping away is the only way YOU can do that then you have done the right thing.

My ma (in her widom) always tells us "What is fi you can not be un fi you"

Your paths have crossed and onl time will tell if it is for a reason, a season or a life time.

Try to get on with your life , not trying t patronise you, you have your whole life ahead of you, focus on developing yourself and being and acheiving all that you can



peace

Sistren: good advice..however I really feel for the Author, she sounds like she is in real pain... However if there is a learning point, it should be that we should step up and take a chance instead of living with regrets....

michsm2 wrote: Oh dear. You refuse to see and talk to someone you like, but probably would spend many hours arguing with someone you dislike. Sad thing is thatyour emotional pain is caused by you not being honest with your friend regardless of the results of confession or the current situation.


Have you done the right thing?

Probably not! your emotions are telling you that, that is what they are there for. Don't punish him because you can't control or changeyour own, sorry to be harsh but that is the simple truth of it.

Peacemaker, what is the point? He is engaged. He will get married soon. I cannot like him, and he cannot like me. Yes, based on what I heard from others, he was very depressed over my actions like someone killed his pet or something. But over time he will realize that he cannot get too close to me. It's only fair. His fiancee will be able to give him the happiness that I could not give him both emotionally and sexually. She is smart, intelligent and very beautiful. I wish those two happiness forever.

michsm2 wrote:
Running away isn't going to solve anything for any of you...besides you'll always be tempted to get in contact again, day after day, year after year especially if you like each other so much. It's going to be torture...unless you REALLY don't want to talk to each other again.

From what I've heard, you sound like you need each other's friendship no matter what you feel for each other. Don't deny yourself that or him either, regardless, it might turn out to be a more important factor in your lives in the long term.



If he was dying from cancer you wouldn't try andescape from his life, so why do it for something that isn't as serious as you think it is right now.

We're not around for too long in one life, so don't waste it....only to live it with regret and sorrow.

And it is much easier to be just friends with somone you love than not to have them in your life at all. In each case you're going to have to deal with the hurt anyway, so why not deal with the one that you will lose lessfrom in the end.

Right now you're taking the hard way when you don't need to.

Peacemaker wrote:

DAMN who knew eh...Peacemaker turn Agony uncle....good points peace really good points!!!

So what should I tell him? I don't plan to see him for some time. I want to clear my thoughts.

So what do you want me to do? Call him and tell him my feelings? Wait another week?