It used to be that upon turning 18 and graduating from high school, children were expected to leave home for college, the military, etc....but it seems, Many adult children are either still living with mom and dad or aremoving back home and in some cases with their kids in tow...what's going on? Is it because of financial or cultural reasons? Or are parents raising a generation of slackers..i.e...young adultswho lack ambition or the skills to make it on their own?

What say you?

asganti, its all about the chip stacking for me, thats why I ainy movred house

I hear you both. I think it's good you both have a plan and are doing other constructive things towards your future.niceone.gif

I asked because my hubby and I, we were discussing this one day and he said that it was just understood in his family that once anyoneturned 18 they had to start making moves...so in his case he went off to school.

Er - I live in Surrey, You think I chose to move back here? I was in Lambeth for a few years but things got really tough and I had problems. When I have sorted things out and got some money I will move back up to town. Right now I am back with my parents for a bit. It is kind of embaressing but I know you guys are all very sensitive and mature so I don't mind telling you.

It isn't good for my love life or partying buty thankfully I still have my friends up in town and I go up there every so often for some fun!

@ Ashanti - well In Nigeria kids are not expected to leave home/ be kicked out at 18!!! (especially if the family is a family of means) Never did understand the Western way of doing that.

I think kids should stay at home for as long as possible and should only move out when they marry or if they absolutely have to. It's about family for me.... Hispanics in this country have it right...you see several generations living in one household, pulling resources, that's why Hispanics are the fastest growing homeowners in the US.

I think the freedom that teenagers have now has a lot to do with them staying at home for longer.

I left my parents home at seventeen years old. I could not stand all their rules so off I went and got a place of my own.

My son is nearly 20 years old and in our home there are very few rules! All the things I was not allowed to do as a teenager he is. He really doesn;t abuse my trust and we get on really well.

So as well as the financial reasons already mentioned I think they stay because they dont have to leave in order to do their own thing. I know a lot of parents with teenagers and a lot of them let the kids smoke weed at home....bring home members of opposite sex...(and sleep with em)....play their music....and lay in bed late on days off work/college.

Who needs to leave home with all that freedom. niceone.gif

As BB said i think it is all about the costs of moving out. You cant buy a house for less than £220k in London and it would still be small and unobtainable to someone on their own unless they have saved / have a good job. I am buying a house next year and i have to buy it somewhere like Reading because it is much cheaper.

Private renting is just dead money and also expensive and nowadays it is so hard to get a council / housing association flat if you are a single person (especially if you are employed).

I moved out at 16, like Locsgirl i could not take the rules. At that time they used to give out flats like nothing, all you had to do was say your mum kicked you out and you gota place. I waited 6 weeks for that flat and i have notmoved backhome since and that was 10 years ago. It would feel strange now to go back home and be with my mum.

I always say that if i got on with my mum i would still be there now though, because paying bills is no joke, and it is good to help your parents out, i hate people that live with their parents but they dont give their parents any help, you got it good at home, contribute.

Peace~

Iyallah...snap I got my marcing orders at 16 too the best thing that ever happened to me...never looked back..

@ Kunjufu

I am glad i left out that young because now i look at my accomplishments for my age and i am doing ok, it could have been worse. When i left my mum was worried that i would not go to college / get pregnant as i would be in control of my own life, but i came through.

The only thing that i feel is that i have missed out on certain things. I would never know what it is like to be at college have a part time job and just live at your mums, carefree, not having to worry about Council tax!!! LOL.And getting married at 18 just progressedadulthood even more!!Or toworkfull time and live at your mums, saving all that cash etc. My friend says it is different when you are there, because she works full time and lives with her mum and just spends, because that is what she is used to. So i guess it may not make a difference when you are in the situation.

Either way i am happy with how it has worked out as it has made me independant and a survivor. Certain things you will NEVER know until you move out and have to look after yourself (e.g. Sardines and bread for dinner, £1 on your electric meter, and how to make it last!!! LOL) , you respect your parents a lot more as well.



Peace~

IYALLAH. wrote: .

Trust me when its your CHOICE to eat it for a day that is different to HAVING to eat it EVERY day because ya brock!!!!


When having it with sweetcorn,is a treat!!!! LOL


Peace~

You think thats bad I know enough people that had cornbeef with pasta because rice was too expensive.

I agree with Happiness I don't see anything wrong with generations all living under the same room as long as its a workable environment set with rules standards and upmost respect. Unfortunately this is often not the case and some of these childrens nowadays need to be pushed out to take on the real world just to shake up their priorities in life.....let them know that water is not hot for free and it took fuel to cook that hot meal and all these things you have to pay for.

I think it should be mandatory for all 16-18 year olds to live 6 months in a boot camp where they have to chop wood for fuel and grow catch and slaughter their own food and fetch water from a river and build their own home and for a treat when they done well give them cornbeef and riceblkdevillol