Your laws on first date etiquette

Moczuczor · (#1 (**permalink**))

I have two sisters who after many years are dating again right now, and theycould both do witha little coaching. For example, on one date my sis insisted on paying half the bill herself even though her date had already offered to pay. I think he might have been a bit put off by this as he hasn't called her since. This prompted a discussion with my girlfriends about do's and don'ts on first dates. Along with that example here are a few others:-

Men shouldn'tgiveflowers on a first date, as it looks like he's desperate.
Both men and women shouldn't talk bad about their ex partners.
Don't smoke in front of your date if you knowhe or sheis a non-smoker.

What else do you think should be added to this list?

IYALLAH. · (#2 (**permalink**))

Talk about general things and do not go into one about work, because to other people that can be SO boring.

Men should always pay for the first date.

This applies to any date, but make sure you look good / smell good.

Do not talk with your mouth full.

Men should always make sure the woman has asafe way of getting home, even though this is her responsibility, ensuring she has got to the cab station (wait for her cab with her), or drop her home yourself, if she drives walk her to her car.

Peace~

Kunjufu · (#3 (**permalink**))

I think if you go with the aim of having fun on the first date you can't go far wrong...I think the problem is people get to serious too quickly..

1_Princess_Blak · (#4 (**permalink**))

Be yourself.

What is the point of pretending to be something/someone your not? Until you stop faking your dates will always be fake - and that can not bring you any joy.

If you cannot be yourself and like yourself - how is that person going to like you?

If you want to pay for half the bill - pay

If you do not - don't

If you want to smoke - smoke (What is the point of not smoking if you are a smoker (should you be ashamed of your decision to smoke))?

If your loud and obnoxious - be loud and obnoxious

If your quiet - be quiet (that person must have known you were a quiet person so is not expecting a Scary Spice character) - Being quite/shy does not make you less interesting or interested.

My don't would be:

First dates should NOT know where you live - meet them somewhere public - to many physcho these days!

Also - I do not think men should pay.

To this day - if I want to go somewhere and I'm telling my partner to come - I pay

If he wants to go somehere and telling me to come - he pays

I'm a modern girl,with some old fashion kinda loving........... (does anyone remember this song LOL)

Moczuczor · (#5 (**permalink**))

Kunjufu wrote:

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I think if you go with the aim of having fun on the first date you can't go far wrong...I think the problem is people get to serious too quickly..

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I think things can go wrong because what you think is fun, might not be to the other person. For example, one date Iremember whenthe guy started singing to me in a restaurant,I nearly died with embarrassment.

Kunjufu · (#6 (**permalink**))

Moczuczor wrote:

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.

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I think things can go wrong because what you think is fun, might not be to the other person. For example, one date Iremember whenthe guy started singing to me in a restaurant,I nearly died with embarrassment.

[line]

Moczuczor: Actually I was working on the ASSumption that there was some form of communication to jointly decide on a fun activity... So when I mentioned fun I was thinking about doing something that both people will enjoy, will engender communication and take the emphasis way from a contrived romantic situations..

Moczuczor · (#7 (**permalink**))

1_Princess_Blak wrote:

Quote:

Be yourself.

What is the point of pretending to be something/someone your not? Until you stop faking your dates will always be fake - and that can not bring you any joy.

If you cannot be yourself and like yourself - how is that person going to like you?

If you want to pay for half the bill - pay

If you do not - don't

If you want to smoke - smoke (What is the point of not smoking if you are a smoker (should you be ashamed of your decision to smoke))?

If your loud and obnoxious - be loud and obnoxious

If your quiet - be quiet (that person must have known you were a quiet person so is not expecting a Scary Spice character) - Being quite/shy does not make you less interesting or interested.

My don't would be:

First dates should NOT know where you live - meet them somewhere public - to many physcho these days!

Also - I do not think men should pay.

To this day - if I want to go somewhere and I'm telling my partner to come - I pay

If he wants to go somehere and telling me to come - he pays

I'm a modern girl,with some old fashion kinda loving........... (does anyone remember this song LOL)

Quote:

You are right that people should be themselves. I'm not saying people should fake their personalities, but there are certain things you would expect on a first date after all you are trying to impress each other enough for a second date (or not?). Don't forget I am only talking about a first date here, not going out with an already partner.

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Also 1_Princess_Blak, whydon't you thinkthe man should payon a first date? Would you reallycontinue to see someone if he let YOU pay, or if he paid for himself and NOT FOR YOU?

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Also the example with my sister, her date offered to pay but she insisted on paying half. Would you have done the same in that situation?

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*CUTIE* · (#8 (**permalink**))

I think honesty is a must, don't put on no fake persona, it will be hard to keep up and ur cover will slip sooner or later. Dont live in the world of make believe, if u start off with lies ie: I live here, have this qualification etc... u will forget ur lies and start looking like a eedyat. Try and get to know each other through conversation, laugh and be humorous, if you amuse each other thats a good thing. Dont behave heavily, ie: read too deeply into things or tell him bout love and kids and comittment, its only a 1st date, not your anniversary! I dont believe the man should always pay nor do I believe he should ALWAYS pay for the 1st date, because if I invited HIM why should he pay? just always believe its a 2 way thing, equality is important.

One Love

Moczuczor · (#9 (**permalink**))

IYALLAH. wrote:

Quote:

Talk about general things and do not go into one about work, because to other people that can be SO boring.

Men should always pay for the first date.

This applies to any date, but make sure you look good / smell good.

Do not talk with your mouth full.

Men should always make sure the woman has asafe way of getting home, even though this is her responsibility, ensuring she has got to the cab station (wait for her cab with her), or drop her home yourself, if she drives walk her to her car.

Peace~

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Good rules thereIYALLAHniceone.gif, but I don't think men shouldnecessarly pay for following dates too.Only for the first one.

Moczuczor · (#10 (**permalink**))

*CUTIE* wrote:

Quote:

I think honesty is a must, don't put on no fake persona, it will be hard to keep up and ur cover will slip sooner or later. Dont live in the world of make believe, if u start off with lies ie: I live here, have this qualification etc... u will forget ur lies and start looking like a eedyat. Try and get to know each other through conversation, laugh and be humorous, if you amuse each other thats a good thing. Dont behave heavily, ie: read too deeply into things or tell him bout love and kids and comittment, its only a 1st date, not your anniversary! I dont believe the man should always pay nor do I believe he should ALWAYS pay for the 1st date, because if I invited HIM why should he pay? just always believe its a 2 way thing, equality is important.

One Love

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A friend of mine went on a first date, and the guy stood around at every opportunity waiting for her to pay. At the cinema, at the counter for drinks& popcorn etc (when she bought the popcorn HE even dipped his hand in there before she'd offered him some). Even though she was the one who had asked him out, I think that just doesn't look good. Needless to say she never contacted him ever again.

Miss Brighter Days · (#11 (**permalink**))

About this paying thing. If you as the woman offers to pay for half the date, don't just do it out of politeness, Make sure you first have the money to pay and secondly don't expect the man to turn down your offer.

I don't see anything wrong with a woman paying for half the date, but I wouldn't pay for all of the date.

Kunjufu · (#12 (**permalink**))

You know I observe this issue of who pays with growing incredulity its no wonder people men and women find it hard to find a date you'll too tied up with money and who is doing what.... My view you're going out expect to spend some money end off, if you don't want to spend money then keep yu arse quiet and stay in..

This is exactly what I meant about getting too serious too quickly and getting back to having fun..I was under the impression that courting was supposed to be enjoyable not a budget execise..geez