Would you pay up?

CA95616 · (#1 (**permalink**))

On BBC1 on Monday there was a programme about benefit fraud.

In one case a single mother of two had let her new boyfriend move in with her. She was ordered to repay 20000 pounds to the DWP. This was because her new boyfriend was expected to meether incomeshort fall.

Would you financially support a partner who had children from a previous relationship?

To what extent?

If you are a single parent would you have that expectation of a new partner?

Turbo · (#2 (**permalink**))

I saw the programme also.....and as a mother of two I would never expect a new partner to pay for my kids as they are not his responsibility.

Whatthat woman needed to do was go and get a job as there was no reason for her to be at home.....

Would like to point out that it's not just people on "council estates" that are on benefits.....

Turbo · (#3 (**permalink**))

Black_power wrote:

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yea but their just mostly the people you see walking round all day dossing till they have to get their kids at 3.30.

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Ouch! Stereotyped much?

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Unless you've done a survey how would you know these "dossers" live on a council estate and not some leafy surburban street, where it just so happens that their property is the only one that is council owned???

Turbo · (#4 (**permalink**))

Black_power wrote:

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hmm no need for a survey...just go to any shop and see the people who are lucky enough to be able to buy and drink alcohol during the day...

watch the general direction they walk off to...the nearest council estate..

if you ask me they should scrap the benefit system all together...just keep it for cripples ect ect

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Lol......you seem to be watching them too tuff!

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Allow them init? They will soon realise that a life on benefits is not going to benefit them in anyway...when pension day rolls around....they'll feel the fire!

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The benefit system is true garbage......needs to be totally re-worked

Turbo · (#5 (**permalink**))

I know that's right......I know many peeps working the system......they know it's wrong but feel they need to do it too survive.....I know it's hard but I prefer to work, it's all about pride.....and I can feel no pride knowing that Im jus loafin at home when I could go and find a job.....nah man....thats not me!

That little piece of government money is not worth it.....once you're on it, it comes lke they own you....

En Sabah Nur · (#6 (**permalink**))

CA95616 wrote:

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On BBC1 on Monday there was a programme about benefit fraud.

In one case a single mother of two had let her new boyfriend move in with her. She was ordered to repay 20000 pounds to the DWP. This was because her new boyfriend was expected to meether incomeshort fall.

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The social policy here is actually attempting to stop the woman moving on with her life. This is a shame but it is how the system is flawed.

Would you financially support a partner who had children from a previous relationship?

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Once you make a commitment to be the new family unit then it's either all or nothing. Obviously if you take her (permanently)the kids come with so then yes you are now the new daddy and that IS your role.

To what extent?

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No half measures.

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If you are a single parent would you have that expectation of a new partner?

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Hmmit's not good to talk about expectations, because they get confused in common parlance for "demands" whichhas an altogether different sound.

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One thing though. Ifthey did take on that role for me thenclearly the biologicalabsent parent no longer has that role or obligation. Otherwise everything getsconfused.

facetygal · (#7 (**permalink**))

I saw it and I'm happy it was white people that was followed and captured on camera. I'm happy when the fraudsters where being questioned them people thought it was joke woman is living with the father of her child, she don't ask him for money to support and he don't think to give her none. I'm happy the bitch had to pay £2000 fine cos some of that moneyshe was getting whilst on benefit was mine. Good, good, good, what goes around comes around.

Kunjufu · (#8 (**permalink**))

Short answer is YES...long answer is if as a MAN you're not prepared to accept the children fathered by someone else... DON'T live with the woman, or better still do not date her...

How can any man who call himself MAN, talk about living with someone and not ACCEPTING their circumstances as a whole.... You are either IN or OUT. If you're in then everything comes with that relationship INCLUDING the children...FULLSTOP...otherwise you should get to steppin...

facetygal · (#9 (**permalink**))

Well said Kunjufu, well said. If me daddy never accept me mummy and her two big head pickney then me and my gorgeous bro wouldn't be born, and me parents wouldn't be married fe 20 odd yrs.

Kunjufu · (#10 (**permalink**))

Black_power wrote:

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well thats unnu's lookout..

Ill be dammed if I pay for a next mans sprog..

and NO it doesnt make me less of a man...if the formen man was a man in the first place he would still be looking after his seed (unless hes dead)

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Sorry Bp...but it does mek you wotless...If you're prepared to live with a woman with children, and not support those children then you're wotless sorry... If you'reNOt prepared to have anything to do with the children then you should not be living there period...

Sorry but as a man I have no respect for other men who behave in this shortsighted way...Yes the biological father should do his bit too..but its NOt about what he does..its about what YOU do as a man..because that is ALL you can control.. and standing by watching and doing nuthing just aint right...

facetygal · (#11 (**permalink**))

Ok so while ur not willing to help the woman with her kids am I under the assumption she is not to do anything for ur child either? If so what kinda relationship is that? And would u still feel this way if u later married the woman and became a stepdad to her kids?

Kunjufu · (#12 (**permalink**))

Black_power wrote:

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what about if you take the woman into YOUR crib...isnt that enough without haveing to pay for the kids too?

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Black Power: in short NO....if you're living as man & wife then you must act like it or else don't do it...can i say you think about it this way... What if tomorrow you dead..and your partner is raising your child by herself.. Consider how you would feel looking down to see some other man with your Ex, ignoring your children, and NOT treating them as equal to your partner or any other children in the relationship...

Without wishing to brow beat you this, however this type of individualistic attitude isn't part of our culture..whether you were born in Africa or the Carribean, we have a tradition treating all children equally..if one can't get they all can't get.. That is how my mother raised me and my brothers and its how I raise my children..

If a child is in your household then you have a DUTY, to do your best by that child period!!! People need to stop with this, it aint my responsibility shit...

LadyDay · (#13 (**permalink**))

CA95616 wrote:

Quote:

On BBC1 on Monday there was a programme about benefit fraud.

In one case a single mother of two had let her new boyfriend move in with her. She was ordered to repay 20000 pounds to the DWP. This was because her new boyfriend was expected to meether incomeshort fall.

Would you financially support a partner who had children from a previous relationship?

To what extent?

If you are a single parent would you have that