Was I too being too nice?

Shemsi en Tehuti · (#1 (**permalink**))

The last 2 or 3 months, I have been seeing this one girl quite often in the gym when I go after work. She is not bad looking, but not something I am really attracted to either. We had become very casual and friendly with each other in the gym since we saw each other quite often. It was obvious that she was interested in me, but I didn't reciprocate it at all.

She would always ask me to help her with things (which isn't a problem), and ask what I might be doing that night or over the weekend. When I said I wasn't doing anything, she would say things like "I'm not doing anything either" or sometimes jokingly say "maybe someone will take me out this weekend" where it seemed like she was throwing the hardest hints she could while holding on to her dignity as a woman without coming off desperate.

I never went out with her, but saw her at Blockbuster (movie rental store) with a fewof her friends one weekend. We were just talking, laughing,and carrying on,and she asked me if I wanted to come back to her place with her friends to watch some movies. I waswith it, because it seemed casual with 2 other girls and a guy there. After the first movie, everyone left and it was me and her. I felt that I probablyshould leave, but she wanted me to stay and have a drink. I hada drink and we started to getreal comfortable with each other. I kept changing subjects and perhaps fidgetingto keep the mood from getting engaging.This is when Iexcused myself to go to the bathroom andused my cell phone to send a text message toone of my friends telling them to call my phone backin 10 minutes. When I came out of the bathroom, we werechillin' on the sofa way too comfortably again. After some more fidgeting and superfluous conversation, my phone finally rang (which seemed like forever). I acted like it was important and had to leave.However, before I could leave, this girl straddles me on the sofa andstarts kissing me then takes my hand and makes me feel her warmth andmoisture. Of course at this point, I am rock hard but managed to get out of there with my pants on.

We exchanged cell phone numbers and now she sends me text messages every so often or calls. I still see her at the gym, and she will occasionally ask when we are going to go do something again. It sucks because she is reallya intelligent, nice girlwho is into me, but I know I could not care for her like she deserves...nor do I even like her like that.

I have seenwhen some women getrejected by a man and will gossip and call him all kinds ofugly names to tarnish his rep. I need advice from men who may have been in a similar situation, or women whoknow how they would want the situationto be handled if they were on the other end. What say you?

Mokele Mbembe · (#2 (**permalink**))

What you shouldn't have done is stay over when it was just the two of you. That's YOUR fault. You don't linger and try jam unless you up to something. When the other two left, you should have.

I'm baffled though. You connect with her, get on with her and say she is intelligent and good looking confused3

What am I missing?

Still too busy chasing prostitues *cough cough* I'm sorry "movie stars"??

Shemsi en Tehuti · (#3 (**permalink**))

Black_power wrote:

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LoL

you seem like you always have some chick on the go.... play on playa

oh I hope you washed your hands...

but on the reals though...you should have just told her that she dont vut it..rather than sticking your hands down here draws (you know you could have stopped that sh*t)

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When a female who is not bad looking is that close to you rubbing on you, you kind of do want to touch but at the same time you don't. Ok, I guess that part is my fault, I could have prevented that contact. Damn BP, I am looking for some advice for now after the fact, not to make a brother feel down about it. Anyhow, yes...I washed my hands...

Kunjufu · (#4 (**permalink**))

Hmmmm either someone is extremely lucky or someone has a vivid imagination...first he gets a 'free' offer of a bj on the D/L...now he has another women wanting to jump his bones....could this be the linx effect working here?

Shemsi en Tehuti · (#5 (**permalink**))

DrunkMonkey wrote:

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What you shouldn't have done is stay over when it was just the two of you. That's YOUR fault. You don't linger and try jam unless you up to something. When the other two left, you should have.

I'm baffled though. You connect with her, get on with her and say she is intelligent and good looking confused3

What am I missing?

Still too busy chasing prostitues *cough cough* I'm sorry "movie stars"??

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LOOOOOOOOOWWW Blow!!

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Anyhow, I didn't say she was "good looking," but just not bad looking. Every guy should be able to relate when a woman is just aiight, but certainly not wifey material.

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Looking back on it, yeah, I should have left when everyone else did.She wanted me to stay, so I did. This is what I am saying...am Itoo nice?

bubz · (#6 (**permalink**))

tell her the truth. what's wrong with saying, I think you're okay but not particularly attracted to you and I'm sorry if that hurts but I want you to be clear on that. at least that way there is no ambiguity. anything else is leading her on and will possibly end up with her getting more hurt. be a man about it.

Shemsi en Tehuti · (#7 (**permalink**))

Kunjufu wrote:

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Hmmmm either someone is extremely lucky or someone has a vivid imagination...first he gets a 'free' offer of a bj on the D/L...now he has another women wanting to jump his bones....could this be the linx effect working here?

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You ever went through one of those periods when it seems like every other girl wantsa piece of you...not to sound conceited or anything. Well, things have been good for me in those respects since the holiday season up until about about now. I'll tell you what...I ain't complaining.

Kunjufu · (#8 (**permalink**))

Actually yes Thoth..I have gone through that period myself more than once..and I may well do in future...so would I get caught up like you....Oh hell no!!... The one thing I learnt pretty quickly.....is that Relationships are very easy to get into.....but friggin hard to get out of once if you're not happy.. So if its too good to be true then it is...as a rule..

and btw when I say'in' I mean once you're taken that first kiss,or worse decided to consumate that relationship...you know trouble will start i you try and play that person... So my advice is be ******* now, and stop tippy toeing around...and tell her straight.....otherwise believe me you will pay big time down the line...

My two shillings worth..

Mokele Mbembe · (#9 (**permalink**))

Thoth B3 wrote:

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You ever went through one of those periods when it seems like every other girl wantsa piece of you...

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Usually happens after you first get with a new chick. Like if you start seeing somebody and you been with them for a few months. You decided to be with her and stay true. That is when evil fate decides to play with you. I guess it has something to do with how happy you must appear to others on the outside because that is when women start flocking around you like mad... gets on my nerves.

Gazelle · (#10 (**permalink**))

This is the funniest thing I have read all day.

ROTFLMAO!

Ingonyama - he is a lion! · (#11 (**permalink**))

Thoth B3 wrote:

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The last 2 or 3 months, I have been seeing this one girl quite often in the gym when I go after work. She is not bad looking, but not something I am really attracted to either. We had become very casual and friendly with each other in the gym since we saw each other quite often. It was obvious that she was interested in me, but I didn't reciprocate it at all.

She would always ask me to help her with things (which isn't a problem), and ask what I might be doing that night or over the weekend. When I said I wasn't doing anything, she would say things like "I'm not doing anything either" or sometimes jokingly say "maybe someone will take me out this weekend" where it seemed like she was throwing the hardest hints she could while holding on to her dignity as a woman without coming off desperate.

I never went out with her, but saw her at Blockbuster (movie rental store) with a fewof her friends one weekend. We were just talking, laughing,and carrying on,and she asked me if I wanted to come back to her place with her friends to watch some movies. I waswith it, because it seemed casual with 2 other girls and a guy there. After the first movie, everyone left and it was me and her. I felt that I probablyshould leave, but she wanted me to stay and have a drink. I hada drink and we started to getreal comfortable with each other. I kept changing subjects and perhaps fidgetingto keep the mood from getting engaging.This is when Iexcused myself to go to the bathroom andused my cell phone to send a text message toone of my friends telling them to call my phone backin 10 minutes. When I came out of the bathroom, we werechillin' on the sofa way too comfortably again. After some more fidgeting and superfluous conversation, my phone finally rang (which seemed like forever). I acted like it was important and had to leave.However, before I could leave, this girl straddles me on the sofa andstarts kissing me then takes my hand and makes me feel her warmth andmoisture. Of course at this point, I am rock hard but managed to get out of there with my pants on.

We exchanged cell phone numbers and now she sends me text messages every so often or calls. I still see her at the gym, and she will occasionally ask when we are going to go do something again. It sucks because she is reallya intelligent, nice girlwho is into me, but I know I could not care for her like she deserves...nor do I even like her like that.

I have seenwhen some women getrejected by a man and will gossip and call him all kinds ofugly names to tarnish his rep. I need advice from men who may have been in a similar situation, or women whoknow how they would want the situationto be handled if they were on the other end. What say you?

Oh dear! how old you boy? I guess 14 or 15, just play wit your winkle till you know wat do do wit a women banana.gif

Shemsi en Tehuti · (#12 (**permalink**))

Gazelle wrote:

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This is the funniest thing I have read all day.

ROTFLMAO!

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